Judges Don't Need To Be Impartial...Just Famous

As I was taking in some of the Winter Olympics this weekend I couldn't help but feel that TV was missing something. All of this good natured competition in the name of country and consumerism is all well and good but can we really learn anything from it? If only there were a venue for really smart people, like celebrities, to impart their wisdom on the rest of us simple folk.


With that as a given, I was pleased to see commercial for a new television show called The Marriage Ref. It looks veeeerry promising. Apparently Jerry Seinfeld's latest foray into network television calls on noted relationship experts Alec Baldwin, Jerry Seinfeld, Matthew Jessica Parker and, fingers crossed, even Madonna to tell couples from middle America what's wrong with our relationships and hopefully their politics.  And while it may seem as though these millionaires are unfairly ridiculing the 15-minutes-of-fame junkies, remember that they do let them eat cake after the taping.

Thank goodness people like Ireland's Father and Sara Jessica's Bearderick have the courage to step to the fore and lecture- er, teach us the finer points and basic practices of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I can't wait for the Olympics to be over with so that we can start enjoying The Marriage Ref, a television show that teaches while it entertains.


I will reserve total judgement until after I get to see the first full episode but with NBC behind it, it has GOT to be a winner. As much as it pains me to say it, something tells me we will definitely learn something that none of us ever wanted to admit from this show...that Larry David was solely responsible for the success of Seinfeld.

Hump Day Part III- OJified

This is PA-thetic. Jay Leno has officially turned the corner where you start believing the lies. Humpy always brags about not having an agent or a manager. Well you know what? He needs one. That or Mavis needs pull the motor oil out of her ears during their sounding board sessions because he can't possibly believe what he's saying. I mean it's getting to be Re-god-damn-diculous.

Guys like Leno need to be punched directly in the face. Or the groin. Face or the groin, either. Let him decide. He really believes that walking away from the Tonight Show and that 10PM thing would've been the "Ego thing to do". That doesn't even make sense. It reminds me of a former friend of mine that tried to convince me that the "bravest" thing to do in the face of bigotry and racism is to say nothing. WHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAT?

I'm not a fan of Harpo but I have to give her credit for bringing up the two year golden parachute that was available for Big Jaw and his crew line. And she surprisingly didn't let him off the hook. Unfortunately she followed it up by asking if Conan was going to do his show. Really?

By the way Gayle should really get Miss O to participate in a few of those flash mobs of hers. I thought Nell Carter was asking the questions.

Hump Day

Jay Leno must have pictures of somebody hidden somewhere because there is no less talented millionaire in the world. And that includes the New York City doorman that won the lottery last year. I mean at least that guy could open doors.

It is absolutely inexplicable to me that NBC, under the "guidance" of Jeff Zucker, would hitch its entire primetime wagon to this guy. Not only will this move fail, it will also kill the one sure thing NBC has always been able to count on, Late Night Progamming. Brandon Tartikoff must be spinning in his grave. This is a classic example of network executives being too smart for their own good. They absolutely over thought the whole late night thing. They were winning in the ratings and had proven that they could find a replacement in the 12:30 slot. So why not keep Leno where he was and let Conan walk?

Don't get me wrong, Leno sucks, I would rather watch Katie Couric's colonoscopy on a loop than sit through Leno interviewing anyone. But he had the ratings. For some reason people find watching Leno comfortable, maybe it's because he steals bits from Stern, Paar, Leterman, Allen and they know what they are going to get. I'm not a Conan guy either but at least he comes up with new ideas. Leno's unwatchable, I had to turn the TV off, during Sunday Night Football In America With Bob Costas, Keith Obermann, Dan Patrick, Rodney Harrison, Tiki Barber and Peter King, when the aforementioned Mr. Costas was forced to interview Jay.

The first episode of The Jay Leno Show was a perfect example of why Leno is out of his depth in primetime. Having Jerry Seinfeld on the show would have been topical...a decade ago, Oprah Winfrey's ratings are off by almost 10%, and that whole "Interview with President Obama" thing was schticky when Not Necessarily the News did it on HBO with President Reagan...IN THE EIGHTIES! No, Leno is awful and if Mr. Zucker knows what's good for him he will pull the ripcord immediately.

Speaking of talentless hacks, that Kanye West interview last night absolutely fell into Leno's lap... and  yet he did nothing with it. I mean, Leno must have a horse shoe buried in that chin of his because Kanye is the biggest get out there, this side of Phil Garrido. Why not have Kanye grab the mic from Jay during the beginning of the show? Maybe have Kanye read his list of Video Music Award Winners.  Something, anything other than Serious-Jay interviewing Mr. West about his mom. Seriously? Who is producing this drivel?

If I was Conan I would punch Jay in the mouth because the Tonight Show w/ Conan O'Brien has a very short shelf life as long as it follows The Jay Leno Show. The irony is that the only thing that will come out of this primetime experiment will be a punchline. Somewhere Johnny Carson is smiling.

The Jay Leno Show is going to be responsible for killing two talk shows at once...not even The Magic Hour could say that.