John Cleese Explains The Human Brain

I had no idea Cleese was so multi-dimensional.

Now THATS How You Retire

While Brett Favre ponders his future in Elsinore, Louisiana Kurt Warner announced today that he was hanging up the cleats in order to move on to, what Chuck Noll used to call, "his life's work." He was composed and gracious in his press conference and seemed to be quite comfortable with the decision.

Warner doesn't get the same sycophantic reaction from ESPN, the NFL Network, Steve Mariucci, Primedouche, Chris Berman, Joe Buck, John Madden, Wranglers, Circuit City, Rich Eisen or Ron Jaworski that Favre gets, BUT he did win two league MVPs and took perennial league jokes, Arizona and St. Louis, to a total of three Super Bowls. And did it with one of the great back stories of all-time.

Think about everything that he had to over come. Grocery Bagging, Arena Football, Trent Green's knee, Dick Vermeil's incessant crying, his wife's infatuation with the Brady Bunches very own Ann B. Davis. Trust me there was a lot on Kurt Warner's plate.

It seems odd to me that Warner didn't get better treatment in St. Louis, Mike Martz kicked him to the curb a minute and a half after the Super Bowl loss to the Patriots. I know what you're saying, "but Trip, you always get on Favre and he was kicked to the curb in Green Bay."

Not true. Kurt Warner was in the middle of a twelve year career and had never "contemplated" retirement through the media. Offensive genius (I don't mean an good play calling strategist), Mike Martz, whose currently getting a paycheck as an analyst (and I don't mean someone that gives insight into strategy) on the NFL Network, wanted his own guy to run The Greatest Show on Turf. Brett Favre started publicly "contemplating" retirement in 2004. He never answered the question directly when the Packer brass would ask. So they drafted a QB that slipped to them at the end of the first round, a QB that many thought should've been draft #1 Overall mind you. Favre throw a hissy fit for the next three seasons, while Kurt professionally moved on.

It's funny, Kurt Warner was successful because he was an accurate passer that wasn't afraid to wait the extra second to allow his receivers to break open. It probably cost him a few years but it allowed his offenses to be special.

There is no doubt in my mind that he will eventually end up in the Pro Football Hall of Fame, the more interesting question? Where does he rank among the other HOFers?

I'm not saying that I would put him ahead of Favre but it's arguable. One fewer MVP, one more Super Bowl appearance, the 3 best Passing days in Super Bowl history, second all-time in average passing yards per game, second fastest to 30,000 yards, all-time completion percentage in playoffs, 2nd highest passer rating in playoff history (although I'm not a fan of the stat). All of his accomplishments happened in about two-thirds the time.

But the best stat of all...number of retirements- ONE.

Hump Day Part III- OJified

This is PA-thetic. Jay Leno has officially turned the corner where you start believing the lies. Humpy always brags about not having an agent or a manager. Well you know what? He needs one. That or Mavis needs pull the motor oil out of her ears during their sounding board sessions because he can't possibly believe what he's saying. I mean it's getting to be Re-god-damn-diculous.

Guys like Leno need to be punched directly in the face. Or the groin. Face or the groin, either. Let him decide. He really believes that walking away from the Tonight Show and that 10PM thing would've been the "Ego thing to do". That doesn't even make sense. It reminds me of a former friend of mine that tried to convince me that the "bravest" thing to do in the face of bigotry and racism is to say nothing. WHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAT?

I'm not a fan of Harpo but I have to give her credit for bringing up the two year golden parachute that was available for Big Jaw and his crew line. And she surprisingly didn't let him off the hook. Unfortunately she followed it up by asking if Conan was going to do his show. Really?

By the way Gayle should really get Miss O to participate in a few of those flash mobs of hers. I thought Nell Carter was asking the questions.

Ooops, Maybe they should've called in the ITablet?

That Steve Jobs has a LOT to learn.

Asleep at the Switch

Ok, first of all I would like to apologize for the gap in content.

No, I didn't say lack of content. I said GAP. Yeah, yeah, I know this blog has always lacked real content. Whatever. Look what I was trying to say was that I have been remiss in my blogging efforts of late and I plan to make it up to you by-

Wait a second what do you mean LACK of content? This thing has been chalk full from the go. Or maybe you have forgotten all of the interesting tidbits that I have wrapped into a snarky little bow over the last five months. You stupid-

Ok, ok, let's put this whole "lack of content" thing behind us. You said some things, I said some things...let's start fresh, ok? Why don't I just empty out the oooooll notebook so we can start anew..

I don't want to bore you with a recap of the last ten days. I mean, what kind of a narcissist would I be if I laid out examples of my personal greatness? Have I predicted many of the events of the last couple of weeks, sure  when it came to predicting the events of the last several days on this very blog? It's silly and childish and I for one won't stoop to such-

Does anyone really care that I knew Tony Romo would come up small in a big game? Or that I said Norv Turner would find a way to coached the most talented team in the field just poorly enough to lose. Clearly not...but if you do it's here.

And I am sure that you people have better things to do than to reread some old entry about how the Jets are going to be a force eventually because Revis, Greene and Sanchez are studs, but nobody wins with a rookie QB. Am I right?

And sure some folks might take pleasure in pointing out that they predicted Brett Favre's last play of the season would be an interception. Or, and I quote,

Minnesota- Brett Favre, despite what you hear from Ron Jaworski, Brett Favre hasn't been a reliable QB since the turn-of-the-century. The last play of the year for Minnesota's offense WILL be a pick, write it down.   - Trip, Tripschinmusic.blogspot.com, SEPT, 2009

BORRRRRRRRRRRing! Who does that? And who would expect any less from the Great Dane from the Bayou. And who cares if Brett Favre threw two picks in the Championship Game anyway? This next part is far more fun and interesting. Now is the two-thirds of the year that we get to speculate on whether he will or won't play again. Riveting stuff. To be or not to be. [editor's note- I really wanted to do a whole thing on Mr. Wranglers (check out Kenny Mayne's piece) because as I have mentioned before NOBODY in the history of the game GETS a pass more than this guy. Both of his interceptions were awful, rookie mistakes and had Brees made them all of the pundits would have lambasted him for allowing the game to overwhelm him. It's why I have never been happier to see an interception...other than every interception the Steelers have made since 1975. Of course that didn't happen at all this year so I am trying to remember the feeling]

You aren't going to hear about how Jay Leno ruined NBC. You can read about that here and here. Nope not from me. But I will say that Late Night television benefits when NBC Executives are idiots. Letterman was always funnier when he was renegotiating his contract back at Late Night. Ever since his move to CBS he has been too fat and happy. Thank you NBC for destroying an empire because now we get the old Dave back. All bitter and filled with venom. The gloves have come off and I hope it continues. But that topic has been beaten to death, hasn't it?

They are going to "reboot" Spider-Man with Marc Webb from (500) Days of Summer [check the list to the right of the best movies of the year]. I mean who could have seen THAT coming?

And finally, Avatar became the all-time highest grossing movie today. Shocking? To some but if you are keeping track at home.

Look I'm not saying that I am better than 93% of you...I'm just saying that I'm smarter. It's like Joan Crawford used to say to her ten year old little girl, after beating her at tennis.

I'm Bigger and I'm Faster. I'm ALWAYS going to beat you.

-Faye Dunaway, Mommie Dearest

[editor's note 2.0- tripschinmusic and GEOL91 Entertainment is not responsible for the any of the following predictions: Mike Vick to Buffalo, The Steelers, Eagles or Steagles winning the Super Bowl, A-Rod choking in the playoffs, Colts losing momentum, or Tiger Woods playing poker at Ken Griffey Jr. house before Elin took a nine iron to his head. Those predictions were meant to be, you know, funny. Ironic. I mean the Steelers winning the Super Bowl again. How many times can one team win the Super Bowl...SIX]

Lame Kiffin

What do you do when you have the number one job in College Football available and your program is standing on the precipice of NCAA sanction induced torture? Hire Lane Kiffin. What John Calipari wasn't available?

I love that USC fans are all in a twit over the hiring of their fifth choice. I mean Jack Del Rio turned down USC and he's about to lose his job in Jacksonville because the owner is going to draft an H-Back to play Quarterback because it will sell tickets. [editor's note- The Over/Under on Del Rio being the Head Coach of the Jags is set at two years and I'm taking the UNDER.]. 

I'm a USC fan and I hate that Pete Carroll bailed for greener, although much wetter, pastures in Seattle. I will admit that I thought Carroll was different than the rest because I thought that he was running a relatively clean program, but the Reggie Bush thing broke and then Reggette McKnight came along and, well, let's just say I was wrong and leave it at that.

Lane Kiffin might have the charisma and hopefully he has learned from his stupidity at Tennessee, but I don't have a lot of confidence in his ability to LEAD, much less act as the CEO to the best football gig in the country.

"Wait, Trip. How can you possibly call USC the best football gig in the country."

It's funny you should ask. Being a college coach is infinitely easier than coaching in the NFL because-

1. You get to pick your players. No draft and no salary cap. 
2. Its easier to manipulate college kids than grown millionaires.
3. You set your schedule. Alameda Community College just doesn't have the talent that the Detroit Lions do.

And then as far as USC being better than every BCS School, and Notre Dame I will list the following-

1. Southern California
2. A Non-Confrontational Fan Base- there is nothing easier than low expectations and apathy. Everyone remembers the tail lights leaving Chavez Ravine when Kirk Gibson hit his Home Run against the A's, right? Well the term Los Angeles Sports Fans is an oxymoron. It's like Jumbo Shrimp. 
3. Recruiting- If you have ever walked around the campus of USC you would realize that recruiting young men to play football is like barrel fishing. The talent pool that exists in Southern California is really, really deep. And don't forget that there are really good football players from the area as well.
4. History and Tradition- SC is steeped in it. From Heisman winners to National Championships, TV Reality Stars to double murderers, the University of Southern California has it all.

It will be interesting to see what sanctions the NCAA place on USC because of the Bush/McKnight situations but eventually USC will climb its way back to the top of the heap. I just wonder whether this coach will be there when it happens. If I were picking someone I would've gone after Jeff Fisher hard.

Instead it's Lane Kiffin. And, sure, he is a ladder climber that will probably go back to the NFL in five years if he has ANY success. And, yes, he seems to be a total pain the in the neck and too cocky by half, but on the plus side he is going to really get under Jim Harbaugh's skin and there is nothing better than watching that red ass implode.

Mama Mea Culpa

Pardon me for not getting all misty eyed listening to Mark Mcgwire's statement that he read over the radio/telephone. I don't want to hear that he was trying to protect his family or that anyone in his position would've done the same thing. He said that the last five years playing Howard Hughes on his multi-million dollar estate has been torture. The weight carried on his shoulders had become too much for him to handle. Wait a second, Mark you know what might help that weight problem...steroids.

Shut up, Mark I'm not buying.

The only reason Mark Mcgwire is coming forward is because he going to be the Hitting Coach for the St. Louis Cardinals and Tony LaRussa doesn't want it to be a protracted distraction to the team. And by the way, Mark Mcgwire is going to be the Hitting Coach, really? Why not Dave Kingman or Steve Balboni. Talk about a "golden parachute." If I ever come back as a major league baseball player remind me to play for Tony LaRussa.

But back to Mcgwire's apology. Mark followed up his phoned in mea culpa with an interview with Bob Costas and then Bob Ley. If you watch those interviews he doesn't answer ANY of the questions directly. And for some reason neither of those to bastions of journalism probed any deeper. It was as though Mark's teary eyes got them all confused and disoriented. Where's Mike Wallace when you need him. [editor's note- I hate that the days of hard hitting journalism are behind us. Nobody answers any questions any more and it seems to be ok with those people running the interview. Think about it. The only time anything truly news worthy comes out is through an athletes webpage, twitter or my space. Sure occasionally a press conference turns up something but there is never a hard hitting interview with no rules. Bring back Mike Wallace.] 

In those interviews Mcgwire said that God gifted him with the ability to hit Home Runs. No, Mexico provided that gift, maybe Balco, but definitely not God. God blessed Mr. Mcgwire with the innate ability to miss the ball completely and hit high pop-ups.

Mcgwire said that he realy, really wanted to admit to taking steroids when he spoke in front of Congress, and that it killed him to listen to those stories about the high school kids that died, but that he "couldn't" come clean because he was protecting his family. Really, Mark? You're going to stick with that story, huh? Ok, well why was it ok for Jose Canseco to admit to using steroids? It's not like he DEA broke down his door after that book came out and he laid out EXACTLY how he did it.

Don't get me wrong Canseco is as slimy as a real estate agent. Wait I'm a real estate agent, $#!+. He's as slimy as a pair of forcep- too much? Ok, Jose Canseco is so slimy...(HOW SLIMY IS HE)...He's SOOoooo slimy Rachel Uchitel banged him first.

Wait, what was I saying? Oh, yeah Mcgwire. Look, I don't think Mcgwire is an evil guy I just wish that he would come completely clean. Own it, don't play the victim. How can we possibly feel sorry for a guy that did something illegal in order to succeed. I mean it would be one thing if it didn't work. You know because then he's a big dumb pathetic moron that traded his soul for magic beans.

But that's not what happened. He cheated for selfish reason, he lied for selfish reasons and now he is "coming clean" for selfish reasons. He doesn't get to play the martyr in this story. He cheated and so far his punishment has been earning millions of dollars, marrying a woman that wouldn't have said hello to him if they were stuck in an elevator together for a month and being handed the St. Louis Cardinals Hitting Instructor gig after compiling exactly 30 more hits than strikeouts in his 16 year career.

Mark, if you want to come clean, come clean. Don't tell us that you don't want to stoop to Jose Canseco's level. As far as I can tell you'll need a ladder to get there.

Hump Day Redux

Well I hate to say it but I told you so...wait a second I LOVE to say I told you so. What was I thinking? It's, like one of my favorite things to do. In fact I hate it when people say that they "hate to say it." It's a complete lie. Not only are they excited to "tell you so" but they have been rehearsing it over and over in their head leading up to the opportunity to do so. There is nothing like bragging about your own personal brilliance.

So as I was saying, I LOVE to say so I told you so, Jay Leno has killed an institution, two TV shows and an entire Television Network. In case you want proof that I warned you check here.

Former CEO Jeff Zucker made one of the biggest mistakes in the history of television, maybe all of entertainment. Late Night Television was OWNED by NBC thanks to the Tonight Show and Saturday Night Live. Those two shows are institutions. Lorne Michaels was smart enough to keep a death grip on SNL but NBC has run the Tonight Show directly into the ground.

Believe it or not NBC started chipping away at the Tonight Show when they first replaced Carson with the unfunniest (that's a word right?) host in the history of the medium. [editor's note- I include Tom Green, Chevy Chase AND Carson Daly in that, but I don't pile on Magic Johnson because he won five NBA Titles and that should account for something.] While Leno eventually took a strangle hold on the ratings, the Tonight Show wouldn't have needed Hugh Grant's mea culpa to get them. The Tonight Show would've seemlessly transitioned had they chosen Letterman from the jump. Leno had NO following then and would've had to had to stand on his own abilities if another network had offered him a similar gig. We now know that he has none and he would've been off the air faster than Pat Sajak.

Jay sped up the Tonight Show death march by talking over the 10PM slot this fall which was NEVER watched, recorded or necessary. This caused people to leave NBC at 10PM never to return again. The local NBC affiliates lost ad revenue, which furthered the demise of the Tonight Show w/ Conan O'Brien. All toll Zucker's decision to appease Jay cost $200 million dollars. So not only does The Jay Leno Show get cancelled but Conan O'Brien is done as the host of the Tonight Show and the mystique of the Tonight Show is dead.

Conan O'Brien shouldn't accept NBC's terms to move back to the 12 hour, even if it means losing some of his guaranteed money. He should get as far away from Leno and NBC as possible. Conan should move back to New York, take the gig with Fox, open up about what a douche Leno really is and give up trying to be the nice/safe guy. No matter what happens Conan will forever be tarred by this New Coke decision and it's not his fault.

If Conan wants to really get back at Leno and NBC he should move to 11PM with Fox. This will further erode the dwindling ratings for the local NBC affiliates, which would be a game changer. If there is one thing that we can be sure of it's that Americans don't want to hear local news. That's why The Daily Show is successful and it's the main reason SportsCenter starts at 11PM. Nobody cares about local news. How else can you explain why Perez Hilton has more readers than the top three newspapers combined.

This story does have a silver lining or two. First Jimmy Kimmel should benefit from a passive lead-in from Conan at 11PM even if it is on a different network. People will just bounce from Conan to Kimmel and will avoid the talentless Leno and surly Letterman [editor's note- I'm a huge Letterman guy, but he has been almost unwatchable lately. Too political and angry. He hammered Susan Sarandon the other night to such a degree that I was rooting for her to just leave. Susan doesn't need that. You'd think Dave would be happy, what with Tiger talking his name off of the front page. I actually heard a friend of mine say that, "Well at least Letterman only cheated on his wife with one girl and they seemed to be in sort of a serious relationship." WHHATTT?]

The other person who stands to gain from all of this is Lorne Michaels. It is only a matter of time before NBC is forced to give Lorne the coveted Late Night Programming Czar title. Under Dr. Evil's directon, Jimmy Fallon will slide into the Tonight Show. Fallon is totally harmless and refuses to take any risks but does so in an affable way. Those are the kinds of traits that are perfect for the Tonight Show in this PC world. I think stars will prefer to go on Fallon's show, and Craig Ferguson's for that matter, because they get treated like a pretty girl on those shows. And there's nothing TV and Movie Stars like more than to be treated like a pretty girl..

The whole thing is a mess and I blame Jay Leno, but the rest of these guys should also be ashamed of themselves as well. Late Night talk shows have turned into an hour long product placement, with shoe-horned clips of early acting roles that were provided by the feigning embarrassed star's publicist and sprinkled with prearranged one liners. Shecky Green would get douche chills watching these shtick-happy hosts.

Until they sort all of this out I'll continue to watch Craig Ferguson because he is the closest thing to the Master that we have. Johnny Carson must be rolling over in his grave...fortunately he is probably rolling ONTO Carol Wayne.

From PARIS With Love?

I was enjoying writing about the Douche of the Decade, Lay Leno, when I saw a trailer for From Paris With Love starring John Travolta and his boyfriend protégé Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Whoa, slow down, there is NO reason to believe that either of these two gentlemen are gay. I have included a picture of  Mr. Travolta and Mr. Reese Mirrors because most of you wouldn't know John Rise Murmurs if you ran him over with your car two or three times. By the way that's Captain John entering the fuselage at left and Jonathan and his mom in a candid moment among hundreds of beautiful models at an Awards Show, below and to the right.

Anyway, I feel bad for John Travolta and his family after what happened to his son and apparently, while creepy, he is one of the really good people in Hollywood. But neither of those things allow you to be in a movie called From PARIS With Love. Are you kidding me? From Paris With Love. Really? Is the movie THAT bad? Why not call in Avatan? Or maybe Free Beer?

Maybe I'm wrong and this will be the beginning of Travolta's third resurgence, but this just screams of desperation. At least the talking baby movie was inventive. Talking babies...so funny, you know because babies don't talk. But if they did they would sound like Bruce Willis and when they looked at big boobs they would say, "Lunch." Babies...talking...talking babies, it never gets old.

And by the way I don't care if any of these guys are gay, straight or even French I just hate it when people, or in this case movies, pretend to be something that they're not. That's why I will never- trust anyone wearing a wig, vote for someone that says they have their state's best interest in mind before resigning their post as governor, get an E-Meter reading or watch Jay Leno.

Maybe all of those rumors about Scientologists Captain John and Little Tommy Cruise remaking Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid weren't that far off. Of course the only difference will be that this one will be called DUTCH Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Oh and it will SUCK!!!

Chin's NFL Quatrains

I don't like to brag, but I have the ability to see the future. Nostradamus, Tarot, Ouija, The Great Karnak...morons. I choose to use these gifts for good. And at this time of the year I'll use it to predict the Super Bowl. In the interest of full disclosure I don't really want to do it because I'm a Steelers fan. Let's face it, I'm depressed, pissed, frustrated, angry and annoyed. But on the plus side, Rolando McClain is going to look good in Black and Gold.

Anyway, because of my apathy towards the NFL Playoffs without the Steelers I will have to revert to the time honored tradition and techniques used in sculpting to come up with my prediction. It's like that famous artist Mikey Angelo used to say, "I look at a slab of marble and just get rid of the parts that don't look like a big muscular man with a small penis."

So here it goes.

Unlike the rest of the National Media I will spend NO time talking about the Vikings chances. They have Favre at Quarterback and I am on record as saying that the last play of the season for Minnesota's Offense will be an interception. They aren't going to win anything. I can't wait to speculate on Brett's football future.  2Br~2B

Another team that doesn't need a lot of thought to eliminate are the Colts. They tanked the last two games of the season which hasn't worked for the last, um let me see....DECADE! Only one team has won the Super Bowl in the last ten years when they mailed it in during the final weekend. That team was the 2002 Bucs and while they may have rested their offensive starters, their offensive starters were Michael Pittman, that loud mouth wide receiver from ESPN, no not Cris Carter. He put up numbers when he played. I'm talking about the other guy. Anyway those two guys and starting Quarterback, BradJohnson. For some reason they rested him even though his only previous success was in a '80s TV show were they wore sports coats without shirts and solved crimes accompanied by Phil Collins music.

ANYway, I'm sure that the Bucs won because they gave those guys a rest. It probably had nothing to do with the defense...which rested nobody during their shutout of the Bears. Bottom Line the Colts aren't winning the Super Bowl either.

I could wow and amaze you with statistics and theories to support the next two eliminations but I'll be honest instead. I'm a STEELERS fan so the Balt-E-More Birdies and the Cincy Bungles are out.

I like the innocence of the Jets. Rex Ryan is a breath of fresh air in his pressers and I think that players love him. I also was a huge fan of both Darelle Revis from Pitt and Shonn Greene of Iowa before their respective drafts. Revis could be used as a return man as well ala Rod Woodson and Greene reminds me of Barry Foster...did I mention that I'm a Steelers fan? The only problem with the Jets is the rookie Quarterback. No team has ever won a Super Bowl with one and THIS rookie never won a big game in college. Sanchez won Bowl games but only after USC was eliminated from the National Championship by Cal or Oregon State. The Jets won't do it, not this year.

I hate New England, but I have to give them a punchers chance because of Brady and Brady alone. That defense is terrible, they can't pressure the Quarterback and the secondary is gawdawful. In fact the only talent on that side of the ball is Jerod Mayo and he still has a ways to go before we start talking about him in the same sentence as...oh, I don't know say JACK LAMBERT. I'm kidding, he's not even as good as Levon Kirkland, er- James Farrior. Hardy Nickerson, I mean David Little. Jerry Olsavsky, he isn't as good as Jerry Olsavsky yet.

What were we talking about? Oh, right the Pats. I'm afraid to say, and when I say afraid I mean totally over the moon about it, that this just isn't the Patriots year.

So that leaves San Diego in the AFC, but I am NOT picking the Chargers because Norv Turner is still the coach of that team and you know what that means? That means that Norv Turner IS STILL THE COACH OF THE TEAM. I would say "sorry" to all of the diehard Chargers fans but there aren't any.

The Saints are out because they were never that good to begin with. Too many holes and they hit their stride too early in the year. In this case I do apologize to the Saints faithful, because despite a bad economy and a devastated community they honestly support this team. Of course there isn't anything better to do in Nawlins than rooting for the Aints. Well nothing better to do that won't land you in jail. So what're ya gunna do 'bout dat?

The Dallas High-Def JumboTrons aren't going to win the Super Bowl either. I just can't pick a team where the Quarterback so consistently comes up small in the biggest moments. And don't forget that Romo is back to acting as the team's holder. Sorry JumboTrons you won't be playing in February, but at least you will have a really big f@(&ing TV to watch the Super Bowl from home. Turns out that the real reason they put a whole in the roof was so that God could watch TV. [editor's note- Jerry Jones is going to fire Wade Phillps. This hurts to type, but look for Cowher Power to find its way to Texas.]

So that leaves the Eagles, Packers and Cardinals. A quick breakdown of the strengths and weaknesses of these teams suggest an obvious winner. The Cardinals have been there before, but they also have an aging QB with a suspect defense and very little running game. The Packers have one of the five best QB's in the league, but a spotty running game, a weak pass blocking offensive line and they don't play well on the road. Finally, the Eagles have the most talented offense in the NFL, but also have a QB that likes to vomit at crunch time.

So it would seem that these three teams are pretty well balanced, right? I know what you're saying, "Hey Trip, you can't pick the Steelers so quit beating around the bush here and tell us your pick." 

Oh, yeah? Just watch me.

The Arizona Cardinals, or the Pittsburgh Steelers- Western Division, have everything that you need in a championship team. Unfortunately the strongest Steeler connection is with Ken Whisenhunt and Russ Grimm and they both hate the Rooneys for passing them over in favor of Mike Tomlin. So, the Cardinals? OUT!

The Green Bay Packers are really hitting on all cylinders right now and the only blemish on their late season record is that exciting 36-37 loss to...you guessed it the Steelers. But that isn't even the real connection. The fact is the Cheeseheads have Dom Capers at Defensive Coordinator. Capers was the Steelers D-Coordinator during the Greg Lloyd-Rod Woodson led Blitzburgh years. In fact Dick LeBeau was originally the Secondary Coach for that toupee wearing defensive genius. Unfortunately for the Pack that will lead to their undoing because Capers is still bitter that LeBeau gets all of the credit for inventing the zone blitz. It's close, but the Packers aren't going to win the Super Bowl either.

This leaves only one team, the Philadelphia Eagles. Is it because of Andy Reid? No. The experience of Donovan McNabb? No. How about the electric receivers Desean Jackson or Jeremy Maclin? Nope. The reason the Eagles will win...because they used to be property of the Pittsburgh Steelers.

Yep it's true, in 1943 Steeler owner/founder Art Rooney saved the Eagles for extinction by allowing them to join the Steelers for one season during WWII. Face it, there would be no such thing as the Philadelphia Eagles if not for the generosity and largess of the Pittsburgh Steelers. It's sort of like, you know, the way people credit Tony Dungy for the Bucs Super Bowl. Same thing.

HERE WE GE STEAGLES, HERE WE GO!!!

Sam Mendes is THE MAN...and he's directing James Bond

I just read that Sam Mendes is slated to direct the next James Bond movie with Daniel Craig returning in the titular role. This is EXACTLY what this franchise needed. I have long been a proponent of making solid franchises, like James Bond, into vehicles for directors.

Years ago Steven Spielberg wanted to do a Bond movie but the Broccoli family denied his request. So he turned his attention to some move about a professor that searches for old artifacts.

Imagine what Mr. Spielberg would have done with James Bond. I'm not sure if it would've been any good but it would've involved James Bonds parents getting divorced. I would've liked to have seen that movie.

Just as I would've liked to have seen Quentin Tarantino's version of the suave spy. He wanted to do a reboot of James Bond and gives himself credit for coming up with what ended up being Casino Royale. Of course he also gives himself credit for being the best screenwriter in the world...I guess it was just his acting that screwed up Dusk 'Til Dawn. Having said all that his James Bond would've been very interesting.

Bringing in the Auteur du Jour to an established franchise will always keep it fresh. It won't always be good, but you will always interesting. Especially if the Broccoli's give over full creative control.

Sam Mendes is a brilliant director. American Beauty was a deserving Best Picture Oscar winner, which is rare, and I think that his best work is Road to Perdition. Jarhead showed significant range (although I didn't like it). Revolutionary Road was brave (because it called for allowing Leo DiCaprio to have his way with his wife) and Away We Go has inexplicably been forgotten in many of this years Ten Best. He is exactly the kind of filmmaker that will give James Bond a fresh look.

Martin Campbell was also a great choice at the two times he was brought in to revive the franchise. He has swashbuckling down to a science. Marc Forster was an interesting choice for Quantum...but it didn't work. And that's the beauty of the franchise. Just kick him to the curb and bring in some new blood.

Other directors that would put an interesting spin on James: James Cameron, Kathryn Bigelow, Zack Snyder, Michael Mann, Chris Nolan. And what would you pay to see what the Cohens would do, or Matthew Vaughan?

All other franchises should follow suit. Hopefully the latest setback with Spider-Man will get Sam Raimi to reassess the need to make another superhero movie with the Jockey and the Hack. Give the franchise some new blood. Hire Joe Gordon Levitt, before he explodes, or someone younger and find an up and coming director, like the guy from District 9 (Neal Blumpkin is his name I think, which is REALLY unfortunate), Marc Webb, Joss Whedon or even Jason Reitman. Reitman would bring his whole teen angst-y-ness thing that is perfect for the teenage Peter Parker.

Holy Tangents, Batman! Batman, I almost forgot. Chris Nolan is the poster boy for rebooting franchises or keeping them fresh. Everything started with Batman Begins. Halloween, Terminator, Freddy Kruger, Superman, Star Trek, all of 'em tried to jump on the "reboot" bandwagon. Nolan was brave enough to hire a comic book geek to write a script that didn't have any of the '60s TV show baddies in it and not only breathed life into that franchise, that was on life support thanks to the nipple cladded Joel Schumacher days, but it also revolutionized the industry. Tarantino may have actually had the idea first, but Begins showed everyone that it could work.

Anyway, I applaud MGM and the Broccoli's for trying to keep it fresh. I just hope that George Lucas can learn something from this.

The Daily Show: Advice for Tiger Woods

This is the Daily Shows answer to Fox's Lead News Anchor, Brit Hume, suggesting that Tiger should become a Christian if he wants to get out of this pickle. It's too bad that the link forces the final image...very funny.




more about "The Daily Show: Advice for Tiger Woods", posted with vodpod

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns, Zach Galifianakis, Michael Cera, and Comedy Deathray

more about "Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifiana...", posted with vodpod